The Facebook Wall is a great way to flirt – we’ve already discussed things to write on a girl’s Wall to make her want you. But just like the wrong post can be exactly what you need to make it with a girl, the wrong post can be all you need to break it. Here are some things you should never write on her Wall.
10. “lol :-p had so much fun last night 😉 lol.”Yes, internet shorthand enables Web flirting, but there comes a point when we’re just like, “That wasn’t funny … is he really smiling and laughing that hard? Is he high??”
9. “Who is that guy in your pictures? Is he your boyfriend?” It’s one thing to jokingly admit to Facebook creeping; it’s another to creep her out by waving your Stalk flag for all to see.
8. “Sup?” Sooo you’re “just saying hi” … literally. We get that you’re a man of a few words, but in that case, maybe embrace the character limit and Tweet at her. Wall posts need a little meat!
7. “How are you feeling? You were still pretty wasted when you left this morning.” Even if you’re trying be romantic with Sloppy Sally, you don’t want to embarrass her – and a post like this outs her as a boozy floozy.
6. “Sorry but your opinion is wrong.” If you comment on any of her status updates or the links and videos she posts with something disparaging – and you’re not kidding – she’s going to think you’re not into her … and that you take Facebook way too seriously.
5. “Your to cool.” This sends a message that you can’t spell. So does “ur 2 kewl,” and this says that you can’t be bothered to write out full words. Come on now, use your big-boy words!
4. “My grandma just died yesterday, so I’m not having a very good day, but I really hope you have fun with your friends tonight. What are you guys doing? Going to that one bar? I had a lot of fun there one time, when I was with some friends. Well, anyway, I’m off to the funeral home so I may not have service, but I’ll call you this weekend.” There are so many things wrong with this post. First, don’t ever respond to a question she didn’t actually ask you; don’t come at her just sharing information. Second, steer clear of bad news. Third, don’t be desperate and let her know exactly where you and your phone will be at all times. And last, keep it concise! This is Facebook, not the opening chapter of your novel.
3. “Hey Rachel!!! Hope you’re having a good day!!! Can’t wait to see you this weekend!!!!” Well, thank you very much. You just came all over my Facebook page. Let me go get you a towel.
2. “Did you take that pregnancy test yet?” OMG.
1. “If the test says no … and you’re still horny … call me!” DISLIKE.
Angie is a freelance writer and girl gamer. Her work has appeared in Glamour magazine, Menshealth and others. After two years of speaking almost toneless Mandarin in China, she is currently based in Raleigh, North Carolina. Her life goal is to get lost on public transit in every major city in the world. Angie blogs at Loveawake